There was never a moment of absolute clarity -- I always felt as though I was
trudging through some sort of partial inebriation.
The context of each situation became almost impossible to differentiate
I think ultimately it was a lack of focus,
or perhaps an inability to be honest with myself
with what I wanted.
Perhaps want was not strong enough.
Want does not prioritize and signify self actualization.
Acknowledging potential and determining the course of action
through which a personalized iteration of success is found gets me closer.
Closer to something that I believe in.
Closer to something that I want to be.